010 - You Gotta Give Yourself Flowers, Too.

I have to congratulate myself and not feel guilty about it.

Back in 2022, when I finally made the decision to move out to LA and chase a career in Hollywood, there was one thing I had promised myself: “Don’t let this place change you for the worse.” Obviously, growth and evolution are inevitable, but I never wanted to be the person someone looked at and said, “Austun, you turned Hollywood.” Or worse—“You’ve changed…and not in a good way.”

That’s revelation has always been something I’ve held close to my heart, because while I’ve always wanted to grow, elevate, and step fully into my purpose, I’ve never wanted to lose the grounded, real version of me in the process. Transparently, I like to think of myself as a pretty humble guy, and working in Hollywood, I really wanted to continue to practice humility because—and I mean this in the most humble way possible—I’ve been doing my thing out here…dare I say my “big one.” I’ve been very proud of myself, and I feel like I should brag on myself just a little bit more, and that shouldn’t be a bad thing. I have to congratulate myself and not feel guilty about it.

For a long time,  I’ve had a hard time personally celebrating my wins because I’ve treated my goals like an obligation, something to check off my list, and NEEDED to do. I’m always thinking two steps ahead, so even while accomplishing one goal, I’m already thinking about my next move. On one hand, that keeps me moving and staying ahead of the curve, but on the other, it stops me from being fully present and robs me of enjoying the here and now. Tapping into my inner therapist for a moment, I think this mindset stems from my childhood. Growing up, I was always a confident individual (and I still am), but back then, a lot of people mistook that confidence for arrogance. As a result, I often found myself downplaying my accomplishments because I didn’t want to come off the wrong way, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve realized… It’s not my fault that I’m him. I don’t know what to tell you…respectfully ha!

As someone who’s truly living out their dreams, working on amazing projects, rubbing shoulders with my favorite industry leaders and celebrities. I’ve been in rooms I never thought I’d be in, and I realize that I subconsciously downplay a lot of the work I do. But why? Truthfully, it’s because I don’t ever want anyone to think I’m a “show-off,” or “doing too much.” Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know I can’t control what people think or their perception of me, but let’s be real, I care how I’m perceived…to a certain extent. I want people to see me as someone who’s doing the DAMN thing, but also someone who’s grounded, grateful, and real.

I don’t have the traditional story of “breaking into Hollywood,” and that’s always left me feeling like I had to work twice as hard as some of my counterparts to keep my spot in this cutthroat space. I don’t have the luxury of being comfortable in this space…yet. After four to five months on a show, I’ve got to find a new gig to be a part of. So while I’m on one project, I’m already thinking about the next one. That pressure? It's constant, but even in that uncertainty, I have to remind myself that I’m here, in the exact places I used to pray for…so why am I still scared to own that? Hmm.

In my 009 post, I talked about being so laser-focused on my goals that once I reach them, I barely take a breath. I don't enjoy the journey or speak on what it took to get there, but I’m learning to shift that mindset. I'm learning to celebrate myself more… and not feel guilty about it. I put in WORK, and I should be proud of that. I think that’s important, and I encourage you to celebrate yourself too. You deserve it. Within the past year, I will say I have been making sure to celebrate myself more and celebrate all my wins, both big and small, while also sitting in these moments and realizing what I have been blessed with. Ive also been practicing not giving a flying f**k if people think I am being a “show-off” because yes, I am doing my thing and will continue to do so…in the most humble way possible though.

On the real though, to anyone out here grinding and growing, this is your reminder to give yourself your flowers. Big wins, small ones, it all matters.

Whew, that’s all I have for y’all today. As always, thanks for reading. I REALLY appreciate it. To keep up with all things Aus, follow me on all platforms @austunreid. I promise won’t keep y’all waiting another month for a new blog!!!

Until next time,

Austun